Children constantly observe and imitate our behavior — what are your actions teaching them?
“And the Word became flesh…” — John 1:14
The Word of God became flesh and lived among us. It’s not that His Word wasn’t enough, but that in His infinite wisdom, God decided that all creation should operate in perfect harmony between word and action. Our Father did not stay on His throne shouting “I love you” from afar — instead, the Creator took on the form of His creation and lived a life of service, sacrifice, and love.
As parents, we feel tremendous pressure to say the right things because our words carry great power. With the best intentions, we try to use every opportunity to teach, guide, and correct in love and wisdom. Yet there are moments when our actions echo far louder than any sermon, phrase, or piece of advice.
A human brain fully develops at age 25, which means that childhood and adolescence are seasons of learning to listen and understand. Knowing that our children won’t remember — and may not even comprehend — everything we say, how much of our words truly leave a lasting impact?
We often approach parenting with well-crafted speeches full of valuable points. But do our messages really reach our children’s hearts?
Surely, they listen to us, and many of our words — for better or worse — will stay in their minds. But perhaps the most important thing they will carry with them is the relationship we’ve built. That relationship grows not only through deep conversations but also in playtime, in the hug that brings comfort, in your presence during ordinary moments, and in small acts of faithfulness that demonstrate love.
One of our greatest responsibilities as parents is to influence our children. Yet as they grow, we lose more and more of our direct control over their attitudes and decisions. When those moments come — when you’re not around — what will weigh more: what you said or how you lived before them?
True, lasting influence isn’t forced or imposed. It flows naturally from connection. And in that connection, we can’t rely solely on our speeches but on the steady simplicity of our daily interactions. Often, a gentle touch communicates more than a sermon, and an act of service expresses “I love you” louder than words ever could.
“Teaching is part of what you do as a parent, but it’s not everything.”
— David McCormick
Your role as a parent isn’t limited to teaching — just as it wasn’t for Jesus. Words matter deeply, and we must love God and others through them. But if those words aren’t supported by consistent actions, our message can do more harm than good.
One of the most powerful aspects of Jesus’ life was His consistency. His words perfectly aligned with His actions. Our children will come to know us better than anyone — but will they be able to testify to that same consistency in our lives? Our goal as parents should be to live in harmony with what we say, modeling integrity and truth. Alongside the bond we build with them, that example of consistency will shape a lasting influence.
Although our words play an important role in shaping our children, it’s the combination of words and actions that forms the legacy we leave behind. If we want our children to build relationships — with God, with us, and with others — that are more than just words, then now is our opportunity to teach by example, expressing love through the way we live.
“Our children need us to communicate with firmness and affection, to set boundaries and show love — and they must be able to see that same love reflected in how we live each day.”
— David McCormick
If you feel you don’t always have the right words, remember that God’s own Word teaches us to be slow to speak and quick to listen. Let’s not underestimate how God can use not only our mouths, but also our hands and feet. With His help, our example can speak as loudly as our words.